There's always a good reason

Why I Never Shame the Subconscious—And You Shouldn’t Either

There’s something I want you to know before we work together.

I’m not here to judge you.

I’m not here to pathologize you.

And I’m definitely not here to shame you for the ways you’ve been trying to cope.

Because no matter what symptom you bring in, no matter how strange, irrational, or self-sabotaging it seems on the surface—I know your subconscious is trying to help.

It just doesn’t always know how.

🧩 “I’ve Never Told Anyone This Before…”

This is something I hear often in my practice.

Clients come to me after years of therapy. Years of struggling. Years of carrying something they’ve never fully unpacked—because they were too embarrassed. Too ashamed. Too afraid of being judged.

But in my world, everything makes sense when you understand the context in which it was formed.

I’ve had clients afraid of kittens. Slugs. Céline Dion music. The color orange. One client even panicked every time she realized she was thinking.

Sounds odd, right?

But the moment we traced it back—every one of those symptoms had a reason. A subconscious link. A past association that made perfect sense once we found it.

Like the client who couldn’t quit smoking, even though she’d tried everything. When we went deeper, we found out she’d been forced to eat a cigarette by her father when she was 14. The subconscious was still trying to spite him—still trying to claim power in the only way it knew how.

The conscious mind knew it didn’t make sense. But the subconscious? It hadn’t gotten the memo.

🤝 Your Subconscious Isn’t the Enemy. It’s a Loyal Bodyguard.

Most people come to hypnotherapy thinking their subconscious is broken. That it’s working against them.

But I know better.

Your subconscious is the most loyal part of you. It doesn’t sleep. It never stops trying to keep you safe. No one has ever worked harder to protect you than your own subconscious mind.

It remembers everything that’s ever happened to you, everything that’s ever mattered to you, even if you don’t remember it consciously.

The problem is… it’s illogical.

It protects you based on associations, not facts.

It doesn’t always know when it’s safe to let go of something. It doesn’t know that the danger has passed. It doesn’t know that the person or situation it was protecting you from is no longer around.

So if your subconscious is clinging to a fear, a habit, a pattern—it’s not because it’s trying to sabotage you.

It’s because it still thinks you need it.

🔎 We Get Curious. Not Critical.

That’s why I don’t shame the subconscious. I work with it.

I act like a subconscious detective. Or as one of my clients once called me, a subconscious whisperer.

I track the root of the symptom, without you having to relive anything. I find out what association the subconscious made. And I help it update its programming—without making it wrong for the job it’s been trying to do.

Because here’s the thing: you can’t strong-arm the subconscious.

You can’t bully it into change.

If you try to override it—like telling someone with anxiety to “just relax” or someone with trauma to “just move on”—you’re going to get resistance.

But when you honor the subconscious… when you understand it… when you show it a better way…

That’s when the magic happens.

🌿 The Weed and the Root

This is also why I don’t just “suggest away” your symptoms.

Because if we don’t find the root—we’re just pulling off leaves.

I’ll give you an example.

Years ago, I worked with a weight loss client who told me to suggest she eat smaller portions. So I did.

And what happened? She started eating more.

Because deep in her subconscious, food was associated with safety.

She’d watched her grandmother waste away and die in hospice when she was 7. Her subconscious linked being thin with dying. So when I suggested smaller portions, her subconscious pushed back.

It thought it was protecting her life.

Once we traced it back and updated the association, then the real change could begin. Because as long as I’m in a standoff with the client’s subconscious, it wins.

✨ The Way I Work

So here’s what you can expect when you work with me:

✅ No shame. No judgment. No embarrassment.

✅ Your patterns will be normalized and explained, not pathologized.

✅ I will assume that whatever you’re doing makes sense to your subconscious.

✅ And I will help your subconscious understand that it’s safe to choose something different now.

You won’t just be given some positive affirmations and sent on your way. You’ll be guided into deep, gentle, respectful dialogue with the most powerful part of your mind.

The part that can change everything.

If you’ve ever felt like your symptoms were too weird, your story too big, your struggles too “stuck”… I want you to know this:

🧠 Your subconscious is not your enemy.

🌿 Your symptoms make sense in context.

🔓 And once we unlock that context—we can set you free.

Contact me for a free no obligation consultation and let's see if we are a fit! https://www.yourauthenticself.ca/book-now